Nothing red-flags desperation in a modern Democrat's campaign quite like class warfare rhetoric. It's a variation on a theme that goes something like this: a rich white guy starts railing against all the rich white guys who are getting richer by the nanosecond and promising that he'll do whatever he can to get rid of the rich white guys. The prerequisite political pilgrimage for Democrats involves taking full advantage of all the opportunities for wealth this country has to offer for twenty years then vowing to make sure such a travesty never occurs again. Irony, you'll note, is never discussed in Democratic politics.
Few in recent memory have followed this plan more diligently than former Senator John "Fluffy" Edwards (D-Unreality). He's made tens of millions of dollars as a trial lawyer and now wants to make sure that everyone knows he thinks that it would be bad if someone else were to do the same. His campaign trails Hillary Clinton's by so much that he needs the Hubble telescope to keep her in sight now so he's hopping on the Class Warfare Express.
It's always striking to note what a disconnect there is between what's actually important in the world and what John Edwards thinks is going on. While most people who can tie their own shoes agree that Iran presents many problems to the free world Edwards has a slightly different view. After new sanctions against Iran were announced last week, Edwards rushed in with this pronouncement, "We need to stand up to these people. We need to stop them and we need to be strong in our opposition." Was he talking about the leaders in Iran? Of course not, he was speaking of the Republicans. In Johnny Land there are no terrorists or hostile nations. The real enemies are greenhouse gases and Republicans. Rich, puppy-hating Republicans who are secretly working on an SUV Death Star that's going to kill all your Social Security.
Today Edwards unveiled his plan to make everything better for everyone all the time. Forever. Yes, Fluffy truly believes that he and the government have that kind of power. I guess they don't teach much history in pre-law. The programs are being referred to as "New Deal-like" in the hope that invoking FDR will obscure their "Old Marxism-Like" qualities.
After a trip to the salon for a haircut and pedicure, Edwards says that his first priorities as President will be losing the war in Iraq, enacting universal (code name for "Government Run") health care and overhauling the energy system. "Those are three things instantly I would do," said Edwards. Instantly? Looks like President Fluffy comes with a magic wand too!
Back to the irony: Edwards was a personal injury lawyer. He can afford good health care because he devoted his career to helping drive health care costs through the roof. One could see how Fluffy's head would start spinning were he to come back to reality.
The best part of today's lecture on socialism from Edwards was his heartfelt desire to have the government fund kindergarten and "college for everyone." Few things make a Democrat salivate harder than the prospect of getting to indoctrinate school children through a government funded education system. It's the real reason they keep telling us that studies show that kids who begin preschool in the womb do better throughout life. The longer you can make them talk about Earth Day and not talk about Christmas the better this kind of nonsense Edwards is spouting has a chance of being believed. "We simply can't have children exposed to their parents too much. They might start praying or something!"
Why am I making such a fuss about a guy who is 17000 points behind Mrs. Clinton in all the polls? Because he's young and will probably be made part of any plans in a (shudder) Democratic administration. And he may run for president again. Mostly, it makes me very nervous when an ambulance chaser smiles and tells me he's got my back.
Cross posted at The Grizzly Groundswell
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