Through The Talking Glass-Issues In Wonderland

I've been alluding for months now to the stark differences in priorities between the presidential candidates of the two parties. My misgivings with the current crop of G.O.P. candidates could fill Al Gore's dinner plate but they all do seem to grasp one thing: we have a sworn enemy out there who would love to see us all dead.

True, the Democrats agree that we have enemies too, but they aren't the same at all. To them, the danger in the world comes from Republicans, cow farts and SUVs. Their apocalyptic nightmare involves Republicans riding in on cow fart powered SUVs who will steal medicine from old people and force the children to learn about God instead of condoms. Al Qaeda? "That's just a fictitious bogeyman that Karl Rove and Dick Cheney made up to scare the ignorant electorate!"

There's a lot of bellyaching lately about there not being any real difference between the two major parties. Not true. One still wants to fight a real enemy and one wants to tilt at windmills (no doubt built with government subsidies). This page on Real Clear Politics lists all the Democratic candidates' web sites. Check them out and see what they think is important. I kid you not, John "Fluffy" Edwards (D-Your Wallet) has an in depth discussion on "Food Safety" on his "Issues" page. Islamic terrorists attack us for thirty years and they pretend it's not happening. Spinach attacks us once and it's a hot-button issue. Soon the conspiracy theorists will be trying to convince us that it was e coli that brought down the towers.

The real issues are the fight against global terrorism and immigration reform that doesn't involve hugs or drivers licenses. The Democrats simply do not understand this. Bill Clinton, defending his-um-wife on her support of licenses for illegals, said that Republican attacks regarding this were meant to distract from the important issues of health care and education reform. Don't forget Food Safety, Bill! This is a classic Democratic tactic. The education system in this country didn't need reforming until the liberals hijacked it through the National Education Association. The Democrats love to create an ill then run on a platform that promises to fix it. It's akin to your dentist giving toothpaste made of pure sugar to your kids.

You may as well not ever bother trying to explain to a Democrat the connection between border security and national security. You'd have better luck mapping the human genome with a Welsh Terrier. They won't understand it until Al Qaeda sneaks several cells across the border to do the bomb making that Americans just don't want to do.

A couple of voices from across the ocean have said exactly what Democrats don't want to hear. The head of MI5 in Great Britain made an almost unheard of public appearance (the British didn't even acknowledge that MI5 existed until 1989) to warn that the danger from Al Qaeda is growing. While perusing The American Princess (a new favorite blog of mine-loaded with wit and sarcasm-both of which I think should be food groups) I found out this quote from Bono about the terrorists that woke me up: "There is an imminent threat," says Bono. "It's real and grave. It is as serious a threat as Stalinism and National Socialism. Let's not pretend it isn't."

This is huge. According to liberals, Bono is the only human created more perfectly at birth than Obama. Somebody at the DNC has got some serious 'splaining to do about why Bono thinks Al Qaeda is more dangerous than the possibility of an early spring in Norway.

Until then we'll all just have to rest assured that a President Fluffy Edwards will keep us safe from the scourge of tainted cheese.

Cross posted at Grizzly Groundswell

Hobbit Boy Throws A Tantrum

Another week, another Democratic candidate who trails Hillary by a light year throwing a fit for attention. Last week, former Sen. John Edwards (D-Your Wallet) promised to give free health care, education and ice cream to every American, legal or not. You've got to admire Fluffy's pluck, despite Hillary's huge lead and the demise of the Soviet Union, he still thinks he can become President and bring back Big Socialism. As Elizabeth no doubt says to him every time he heads to the salon, "You go, Girl!"

This week's "Daddy I want an Oompa Loompa and I want him now!" fit comes from our favorite live-action Hobbit, Rep. Dennis Kucinich (D-The Shire). There's more distance between Kucinich and Hillary in the polls than there is between Bill and Hillary in bed. He also trails Joe Biden and Bill Richardson. I swear, they're both running for president. Real Clear Politics doesn't even put him on the chart they use to track poll averages. Good news: he consistently runs a solid third place among voters in his own home.

Clearly, Kucinich is in need of doing something to get noticed. Nothing gets things going in a campaign like a good battle cry. But a battle needs an enemy. Who did Denny pick? Al Qaeda? No. Iran? Uh-uh. Oh wait, I know, greenhouse gases! Nope. Denny stomped his furry little Hobbit feet and decided that Dick Cheney needed to be impeached.

It's this kind of frivolous politicking that makes it hard to take Denny seriously about anything. His supporters, such as they are, don't help. Most of the modern day Democratic power structure is made up of hippies who eventually found their ways into a shower, then college. The Kucinich Fringe seems to be made up of the ones who chose to remain stoned and earthy. Every time I see a car with a Kucinich sticker on it the thing looks as if it could be used in the background of a period movie about Woodstock.

Kucinich seriously believes that trying to take down a sitting Vice-President is good for the country and his campaign. After all, removing Cheney will keep us from bombing Iran, right? Actually, removing Mahmoud Ahmadinejad would do more towards that end than removing Dick Cheney. While trying to be outlandish so he can be noticed, Hobbit Boy is still toeing the Democratic party line that our only real enemies are to be found in the G.O.P.

That's why he's irrelevant. It should be why the entire crop of Democratic hopefuls this year is irrelevant. It's like the terrorists have put some sort of spell on the Democrats that make them incapable of recognizing an enemy outside our borders. Until they get a leader who opens his or her eyes after this spell wears off we need to vote and make sure that none of them get to play with the grown-up stuff.

Cross posted at Grizzly Groundswell

"It was just my imagination..."

Or was it? Whenever I bring up the topic of liberal bias in the media with one of my many Democrat friends I tend to get a response not unlike one you'd give a wild-eyed man who just told you that aliens took him up for a probe on the Mother Ship last night. They vary in tone but the gist is usually "You're crazy and you're imagining this." Now, I have very few arguments against my lack of sanity. I was just talking to myself about it this morning. In fact, four out of the five voices in my head agree that something is wrong with me. But I know I'm not imagining the leftward tilt of the mainstream media in this country.

Up until now, if you trotted out facts in support of bias claims you would run into the same problems. First, Democrats are allergic to facts. This allergy enables them to ignore global terrorism and spend their lives in a panic about Manhattan being swallowed by the Atlantic ocean. There's a better chance that Manhattan will be swallowed by Al Gore during a business lunch than by a melting glacier.

The second problem is that the sources of media bias facts would be questioned. You'd be told that Brent Bozell is conservative, so he just finds what he wants to find. Or that Bernard Golberg is disgruntled and has an ax to grind. Sooner or later, they'd find a way to say it was all funded by Big Oil.

But look at who just published the latest set of facts supporting the bias claim. Newt Gingrich? No. Me? I told you I'm busy talking to myself a lot lately. Darth O'Reilly over at Fox News? Nope. That renowned conservative think tank, Harvard University, gives us today's numbers to chew on. Not even your most ardent left wing conspiracy nut will be able to downplay the news by claiming that Harvard suddenly drank the Kool-Aid.

Here are the results of the joint survey done by the Project for Excellence in Journalism and Harvard's Joan Shorenstein Center on the Press, Politics and Public Policy. To those of us who have been paying attention to reality instead of cartoons about drowning polar bears, none of these results are surprising. CNN is the most hostile to Republicans. Really?!?!? Next you'll be telling me that Joan Rivers has had some work done on her face. Seriously, people.

PBS (American Pravda) threw up a big goose egg in the percentage of stories favorable to the GOP. NPR (American Pravda Morning Edition) went negative on Republicans almost four times as much as they did Democrats. The article doesn't mention Katie Couric because, well, nobody mentions Katie Couric any more. Naturally, according to most of the media, Barack Obama should skip the presidency altogether and go right to sainthood. Every time we see him stumble in his own b.s. he seems to land in halo polish as far as the press is concerned.

What I've never understood is why the modern media can't just own up to its political leanings. A New York Times reporter who feigns objectivity is either a phenomenal actor or abusing Xanax. It's like parents pretending they think all the other babies are as cute as theirs. I used to avoid contact with other parents when my daughter was little just so I wouldn't have to fake a compliment about some little troll baby. When you're a parent you think none of the other children measure up to your own and when you work at the New York Times you think all Republicans are the spawn of Satan. Let's admit it already!

Hey, let's use one of the liberals favorite arguments against them: they do it in Europe! Remember, according to the Left, if it happens in Europe it's even more awesome than Obama. Newspapers all over Europe, especially England, not only proclaim their political leanings, they boast about them. Let's stop pretending that the New York Times is ever going to endorse a Republican for president again and get on with the business of the day. I don't see why the Left is against this, it makes perfect sense...oh...

Cross posted at Grizzly Groundswell

Fight Faux Fairness!

Like an STD in Bill Clinton's medical records, the "Fairness Doctrine" is waiting to make a comeback and wreak havoc with the lives of people who weren't paying close attention. Instituted in 1949, it purported to give both sides of controversial issues air time. That worked about as well as a Lindsey Lohan trip to rehab. What ensued were about 30 years of left-wing domination of the media. Thankfully, Ronald Reagan got rid of this socialist abomination in the 1980s and that paved the way for the rise of conservative talk radio. Irony of ironies: things actually became fair once the Fairness Doctrine was gone. Republicans got to have talk radio and Democrats got to have the networks, the universities, public schools, Hollywood and Chicago. OK, that does seem like there's still a bit of imbalance but-hey-at least we finally got something.

The Left seemed to tolerate the rise of talk radio until Fox News came along. Now the Republicans could be seen on TV as well! "Oh my (insert non-denominational entity here)! Now the children will be able to see that the right-wing whackos don't really have horns and fangs-we've got to do something!" When they found out all of us mindless talk radio morons could turn on our computers as well the playground whining ("Hey-no fair!") to reinstate the Fairness Doctrine began in earnest.

They can't do anything about it just yet. However, if the other Mr. Clinton gets elected next year all bets are off. Hillary has already proven that she'll go on the paper like a good dog whenever The DailyKos or MoveOn.org tell her to. She'll be on a real short leash with them if elected and an executive order to reinstate the Fairness Doctrine will probably show up before her luggage gets to the White House.

Here's what it really does. If someone complains to a station that carries Rush Limbaugh that station has to put a liberal talk show on if they want to keep Rush on the air. The Air America people finally get to leave the void they've been living in and get on a big people's radio station! They might even bring their listener along. You can see the sound business sense of balancing a profit making machine like Rush with three hours a day of Skippy the Chimp from Air America discussing new ways to lose wars and raise taxes, can't you? Larger stations will figure out a way to make it work, smaller ones will have to get rid of Rush and do a call-in show about scrapbooking.

To clear it up, let's imagine this lunacy being applied in other areas.

The NFL would have to provide teams an equal amount of playing time during the games if one team was too good.

Everyone gets into Harvard now! It's just not fair to limit it to the smart kids.

If you're a bit of a loner and can't get a date, the government has to provide you with one for every time your good looking roommate goes out. It may sound good at first but the government doesn't require the date to like you. She'll leave eventually and, like Air America, you're still a loser who can't get anyone to pay attention to you on your own.

Something needs to be done while we still have a Republican in the White House. Enter Rep. Mike Pence (R-IN) and "The Broadcaster Freedom Act." This act would prohibit the FCC from reinstating the Fairness Doctrine. House Speaker Nancy Pelosi (D-Asylum) has blocked the bill. Rep. Pence is trying to get the 218 signatures needed to bring the bill directly to the floor for a vote. There is more information about the petition here. This site says he has 185 signatures but I heard him say on Laura Ingraham's show this morning that it's up to 190 now. There are also links there to find out if your representative has signed or not and to contact the ones who haven't.

Despite what Democrats like to believe, Republicans enjoy First Amendment rights too. Let's fight for them now or we're all going to end up in some underground chat room, lamenting the fact that our favorite talk station now just airs stories about what Britney Spears isn't wearing that day.

Cross posted at The Grizzly Groundswell

Chairman John

Nothing red-flags desperation in a modern Democrat's campaign quite like class warfare rhetoric. It's a variation on a theme that goes something like this: a rich white guy starts railing against all the rich white guys who are getting richer by the nanosecond and promising that he'll do whatever he can to get rid of the rich white guys. The prerequisite political pilgrimage for Democrats involves taking full advantage of all the opportunities for wealth this country has to offer for twenty years then vowing to make sure such a travesty never occurs again. Irony, you'll note, is never discussed in Democratic politics.

Few in recent memory have followed this plan more diligently than former Senator John "Fluffy" Edwards (D-Unreality). He's made tens of millions of dollars as a trial lawyer and now wants to make sure that everyone knows he thinks that it would be bad if someone else were to do the same. His campaign trails Hillary Clinton's by so much that he needs the Hubble telescope to keep her in sight now so he's hopping on the Class Warfare Express.

It's always striking to note what a disconnect there is between what's actually important in the world and what John Edwards thinks is going on. While most people who can tie their own shoes agree that Iran presents many problems to the free world Edwards has a slightly different view. After new sanctions against Iran were announced last week, Edwards rushed in with this pronouncement, "We need to stand up to these people. We need to stop them and we need to be strong in our opposition." Was he talking about the leaders in Iran? Of course not, he was speaking of the Republicans. In Johnny Land there are no terrorists or hostile nations. The real enemies are greenhouse gases and Republicans. Rich, puppy-hating Republicans who are secretly working on an SUV Death Star that's going to kill all your Social Security.

Today Edwards unveiled his plan to make everything better for everyone all the time. Forever. Yes, Fluffy truly believes that he and the government have that kind of power. I guess they don't teach much history in pre-law. The programs are being referred to as "New Deal-like" in the hope that invoking FDR will obscure their "Old Marxism-Like" qualities.

After a trip to the salon for a haircut and pedicure, Edwards says that his first priorities as President will be losing the war in Iraq, enacting universal (code name for "Government Run") health care and overhauling the energy system. "Those are three things instantly I would do," said Edwards. Instantly? Looks like President Fluffy comes with a magic wand too!

Back to the irony: Edwards was a personal injury lawyer. He can afford good health care because he devoted his career to helping drive health care costs through the roof. One could see how Fluffy's head would start spinning were he to come back to reality.

The best part of today's lecture on socialism from Edwards was his heartfelt desire to have the government fund kindergarten and "college for everyone." Few things make a Democrat salivate harder than the prospect of getting to indoctrinate school children through a government funded education system. It's the real reason they keep telling us that studies show that kids who begin preschool in the womb do better throughout life. The longer you can make them talk about Earth Day and not talk about Christmas the better this kind of nonsense Edwards is spouting has a chance of being believed. "We simply can't have children exposed to their parents too much. They might start praying or something!"

Why am I making such a fuss about a guy who is 17000 points behind Mrs. Clinton in all the polls? Because he's young and will probably be made part of any plans in a (shudder) Democratic administration. And he may run for president again. Mostly, it makes me very nervous when an ambulance chaser smiles and tells me he's got my back.

Cross posted at The Grizzly Groundswell