After two weeks of sadistically giving false hope to the likes of Bill Richardson (D-Invisible) and Chris Dodd (D-Why Am I Here?), Hillary Clinton (D-Testosterone) reclaimed her masculine side and restored order at the Democrat's debate. John Edwards (D-Up In Your Business) is once again the only woman making a historical bid for the presidency.
I've been trying not to pay attention to these things (either party's) because I never like the various formats. These debates are nothing more than amateur political porn, with each candidate trying to excite donors just enough to make them pay to see more.
Hillary did actually have a chick moment when she complained about being "personally attacked." Oh stop. I don't want a president who is going to stomp her feet and ride a wave of estrogen out of the room whenever someone says something she doesn't like. She sounds like an aggrieved crack addict mom on Jerry Springer when she whines like this.
The sharp contrast between her experience and Saint Obama's (D-Not Much There) lack thereof was shown when the illegal license lovefest was brought up again. Obama's problems inevitably arise when he ceases being the smiling guy on the magazine covers and becomes a three dimensional figure who has to say stuff. When the subject can be approached with vague, obvious generalities ("All children should be young and happy!"), Obie's quite the charmer. If specifics are involved, the saying of the stuff becomes a problem.
After attacking a wounded Future Madame President for two weeks about her licenses for illegals flip-flops one would have presumed that Obama would have thought through some coherent ideas of his own on the subject. Ah, but the conveying of the ideas requires the saying of the stuff.
The reason that Democrats have a hard time with the illegal immigration issue is that they're required by their handlers over at MoveOn.org and The Daily Kos to avoid the, well, illegality of it all. It's difficult to make a logical argument for or against anything when you have to pretend the very essence of the argument isn't there.
Here are some excerpts from the debate that illustrate how the Sainted One managed to undo whatever momentum he'd gotten going against The Pantsuit. We'll begin with Wolf Blitzer's question.
MR. BLITZER: All right. I want to just press you on this point because it's a logical follow-up, and then I want to go and ask everyone. On the issue that apparently tripped up Senator Clinton earlier, the issue of driver's licenses for illegal immigrants, I take it, Senator Obama, you support giving driver's licenses to illegal immigrants. Is that right?
SEN. OBAMA: When I was a state senator in Illinois, I voted to require that illegal aliens get trained, get a license, get insurance to protect public safety. (Scattered applause.) That was my intention. And -- but I have to make sure that people understand the problem we have here is not drivers licenses. Undocumented workers don't come here to drive. (Laughter.) They don't go -- they're not coming here to go to the In-N-Out Burger. That's not the reason they're here. They're here to work. And so instead of being distracted by what has now become a wedge issue, let's focus on actually solving the problem that --
MR. BLITZER: All right.
SEN. OBAMA: -- this administration, the Bush administration, has done nothing about.
Translation: "Nonsense, nonsense, nonsense...Bush's fault!"
In-N-Out Burger? You can almost imagine a voice in his head screaming "Why can't I just shut up-oh no-am I still talking? Please make it go away!"
It gets better. He should have asked for a blindfold and a firing squad at this point, it would have been more humane.
Barring, avoiding, assuming there isn't going to be comprehensive immigration reform, do you support or oppose drivers licenses for illegal immigrants?
SEN. OBAMA: I am not proposing that that's what we do. What I'm saying is that we can't -- (interrupted by laughter). No, no, no, no, look, I have already said I support the notion that we have to deal with public safety and that drivers licenses at the state level can make that happen. But what I also --
MR. BLITZER: All right.
SEN. OBAMA: But what I also know, Wolf, is that if we keep on getting distracted by this problem, then we are not solving it.
Translation: "I'm not saying that's what we should do but I've already said that's what we should do."Who preps him for these things-Miss Teen South Carolina?
Blitzer then explains to them that this is a "yes" or "no" question and asks them to answer accordingly. Here's what happened when he got to Obie:
Senator Obama, yes or no?
SEN. OBAMA: Yes.
"He did it! Our little guy finally rode his bike without falling!"His Blessedness was seemingly out of the woods. He'd given the one word answer required of him then shut up. Seconds later, as if allergic to shutting up, he started to say stuff again. He wants to be president but he can't grasp a complex notion like "yes or no question." The verbal diarrhea continued:
MR. BLITZER: Okay. (Applause.)
SEN. OBAMA: I am going to be fighting for comprehensive immigration reform, and we shouldn't pose the question that somehow we can't achieve that. I believe that the American people desperately want it. That's what I'm going to be fighting for as president.
MR. BLITZER: Senator Clinton?
SEN. CLINTON: No.
Game, set, pantsuit.The main action happened between Hillary, St. Obama and Fluffy Edwards. The other guys were so removed that I kept expecting CNN to install a window on stage that they could stand behind and press their noses against to watch the actual candidates.
Mrs. Clinton, no doubt, probably went to sleep rather easily after this one. Sadly, Barack Obama is going to be awake for another day or two while he finishes explaining his one word answer.
Cross posted at Real Clear Politics (Vote for it!)
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